Quick Bite: Meeting Anxiety
Is your next meeting causing you stress or anxiety right now? Happens to me!
I’m borrowing the RAIN method for this post. Here’s some quick thoughts you can try right now:
R - Recognize
Acknowledge the stress, fear, anxiety, worry. This does not mean you condone it. I’ll say it again: recognition does not mean it’s something you want to keep happening.
It’s okay. Just call it out. Call out other things too. “I’m in a chair.” “The wall is white.” “My phone is in a case.” “The sun is shining through the window.” Call out multiple facts, including what you’re feeling.
A - Allow (or Accept)
Let those feelings and thoughts sit there. You can’t push them away or reason them away with logic. How many times have you successfully argued yourself out of a bad feeling by using your intellect. My score is zero.
Have you ever seen a friend or loved one in bad pain, maybe they’re crying, and you just sat by them while they struggled, but there was nothing you could do or say to ease their pain? So you just stayed with them.
Close your eyes and notice how your body feels. Watch your breathing without changing it. “I feel pain in my chest.” “My head hurts over here.” Just allow all of it to be there.
I - Investigate
Do this gently. Why the anxiety? What are you afraid of? Why does this make your chest hurt? How bad is the pain? Be genuinely inquisitive, there is always the chance for a new answer, no matter your age.
N - Nuture
You are very likely feeling these things because your body/mind are actively protecting itself. This is a mechanism you have acquired and developed over time that somehow makes you feel safe. And yet, it makes you feel worse, isn’t that strange?
Don’t be hard on yourself when these things arise, because every human feels this in innumerable ways throughout life. It’s just a part of your natural process.
Be patient with yourself and give grace — you’re trying to protect yourself, and that’s really cool. Maybe sometime you can evolve it to something less difficult to feel, but that’s a future conversation.
When things like this happen, these steps can help you stay calm and relax while the feelings fade away. And that’s the nugget: these feelings too will fade, like all things do. How many times has this fear or anxiety happened to you? I bet way more than you can remember!
That’s because those moments are gone, just like this will be. You got this, be good to yourself.
